Rey of Obsession
by AmeliaJade326
Summary: Alternate Universe story with our favorite characters. Very dark but with elements of humor. Might trigger those with delicate sensibilities toward dub con and other darker material. Rey is a survivor and just trying to navigate life when a giant in black bursts through her walls whether she likes it or not.
1. Chapter 1

AN: This is literally my first story in close to 6 years. I have other stories I haven't touched since then but I recently saw TLJ and I was so entranced by the tension and magnetism between Kylo and Rey that I felt the need to write something for them. I have since had ideas for at least three different stories for these two but I don't want to get too deep into a bunch of different things at once while easing back into this. So, if reception is good I will start the other stories once I am confident enough with this. I also have a 2-year-old so there's that lol

It started like any other day, as cliché as that sounds, it did.

"This place is packed."

The observation was not a wrong one.

The building that housed the adoption shop wasn't very big to begin with but with this many people packed inside it was even more claustrophobic.

 _I hate this so much_

Rey couldn't take two steps on either side of her without bumping into some old lady cooing over a small animal.

Stupid Finn and his stupid puppy dog eyes making her come here with him to find a pet.

According to him the shop was having a sale to promote adoptions since it was so close to the holidays and people were looking to take advantage to adopt the abandoned pets. Rey thought it was a noble and wonderful cause but she absolutely hated what leaving her comfy apartment in the dead of winter entailed.

Only her love of Finn and Poe would be enough to force her into this maelstrom.

"Oh Rey, lets go get a pet to commemorate my new place with Poe. It'll be fun. It will only take a minute. I'll know what I want as soon as I see it. Blah, blah, blah."

"You look like you're enjoying yourself?"

The amused voice breathed into Rey's ear hot and tingly. If one were to force Rey to relive the moment she definitely wouldn't recount the squeak and jump the surprise drew from her, but that wouldn't mean it didn't happen.

Rey cleared her throat and straightened herself looking up into what was clearly the giant from Jack and the Bean Stalk standing to the side of her. She couldn't help but sneer at the wide berth he seemed to be getting while she was getting knocked around like a pinball.

Rey couldn't help the thought that manifested with a secret grin at the large man.

 _Apparently, size does mean something_

Maybe it was the fact that this guy had managed to sneak up on her especially with his clearly inhuman size, she hadn't managed to hear or sense him, but she felt that he did this a lot.

"Yeah, having a ball. Just, the greatest time of my life. The stench of White Diamonds and cat urine is my idea of the ultimate aphrodisiac."

She could tell right away that he was one of those annoying guys who thought that her sarcasm was, "cute".

"Well, then you are definitely in the right place Rey."

Rey just raised her eyebrow, "How do you know my name?"

This garnered an eyebrow raise and a small grin from him, "I had to assume you are the Rey you were speaking about in your dialogue or maybe you are Poe?"

 _Ahhh_

"No, I am Rey, sorry, I know I am being a bit taciturn, but I am really uncomfortable in such crowded places. They make me a bit cranky, and the fact that I didn't want to come in the first place doesn't help my disposition."

Taking an actual glance at the guy who had straight up ghost appeared behind her she could see more than just the size of him. He had dark black hair that grazed the top of his shoulders and deep blue eyes with brown flecks through them. He was wearing a black sweater with a pair of black jeans, and even his sneakers were black.

"Let me guess, your favorite color is black?"

He only shook his head, hair moving around his head lightly with a smirk on his very full lips.

"Favorite movie is Dracula?"

Another head shake but this time it had a huff of breath she had to assume was a laugh at her ridiculousness, and he pointed to his name tag which she hadn't seen while she was ogling his sweater.

"Kylo? What kind of name is that?"

The furrow of his brow was enough to let her know that the amused question had insulted him.

 _Jeez touchy much, better smooth it over_

"It's a good name. Strong, and it's very unique."

 _That's it Rey talk to the cute giant like a normal human_

Rey could tell this was the correct response by the small red blossoms on his cheeks.

"That's the point."

Just from the exchange she could tell that this was most definitely not his real name and that this was most likely a nickname or something. Well, far be it for her to rag on someone else for their name choices. She was pretty sure "Rey" wasn't her real name either only she hadn't chosen hers.

His real name was probably something super embarrassing like Ernest, and just the thought of this adorable giant being named Ernest made her grin.

Rey didn't know what he must have thought of her sudden amicability towards him because he took a step closer into her personal space and raised his hand. Rey was startled and for a second was frozen at the thought of this stranger touching her for some reason, when, "Hey Rey!"

 _Oh, you are so forgiven Finn I love you_

"I've been looking everywhere for you."

Finn gave a glance at the scene he had walked up on and raised an eyebrow at Rey. She only shook her head to indicate they would talk about it later.

Kylo's hand faltered at the presence of Finn and returned to his side. Rey could tell he was frustrated by the not so subtle clenching of his jaw, but he just stood there.

It was awkward.

Thankfully some lady had noticed that an employee was standing right behind her and asked Kylo for some help getting a giant bag of dog food that was on sale down from a shelf drawing his attention away from Rey and Finn.

They both breathed a sigh of relief at the change in the intense mans attention and slowly drifted away. Rey hated being this rude even when he had been weird but she had a feeling that standoff would have never ended if they hadn't.

"What was that about Rey? Was he bothering you?"

"No, he wasn't bothering me but it was a bit weird. He showed up out of nowhere and we were talking, somewhat, and then you showed up."

Rey knew she was downplaying the charged interaction a bit but she also didn't want her friend to worry over nothing and that was Finn's specialty especially when it came to her.

"He was probably just trying to get me to buy something or a pet."

"Ok Rey if you say so."

 _Skeptical thy name is Finn_

Rey couldn't help smiling at her friend and his worry over her.

"I'm glad you're getting this pet because now maybe you'll stop worrying about me all the time big worrywart."

"Never happen sweet cheeks, I'll just have another set of ears aside from Poe's to complain to as you keep trying to give me my first grey hair."

Thankfully the building was slowly but surely filtering out all the people by the time they reached where the adorable kittens cubicle had been so they managed to reach it without too much trouble.

A man in a wrap sweater and what Rey believed were lounge pants was standing near the set of cubes housing the kittens. Rey took stock of the older gentleman. He had longer grey hair and a full mountain man beard and moustache, also greying.

He had kind eyes and was leaning on a cane slightly.

"Hey Luke."

Finn called to the older man. Rey noticed his name tag was in the same style and placement that Kylo's had been indicating he worked there, though unlike Kylo's this one had a title underneath "Manager/Owner".

"I asked him to stay near the kitten I was looking at since I was so sure I wanted her and didn't want her to get snatched up."

Rey nodded in understanding as Finn answered her unasked question about why the Manager was waiting for them.

"Finn, and this must be THE Rey I have heard so much about?"

"Uhhh, hey?"

Rey looked at Finn.

"Right, well for part of one of my animal health and care course I worked here examining the animals that were brought in. I happened to talk about you a few times while I was here."

"A few times? He wouldn't shut up about "Rey this" and "Rey that". It was hilarious."

Luke's face lit up at the humorous recollection and Finn's blushing at being caught gushing over his friend that Rey couldn't help but grin at the banter.

With the awkward tension dissipated the interaction between the three flowed smoothly with humorous recollections and stories between Luke and Finn. Rey watched Luke get the kitten, an adorable tortoise shell with the cutest thumbs, because of course Finn would pick something unique.

When she 'mew'-ed at Finn and she could see why he was so smitten with the kitten.

Luke and Finn walked off to get the paperwork finished and to get some supplies for the new addition to Poe and Finn's household ready.

Rey waited behind and was playing through the glass with one of the pups in the bottom cubicle when the instinct that had kept her alive through her hardships told her danger was nearby.

Her body itself was cold but there was a source of immense heat radiating behind her.

Like a droplet of rain languidly making its way down a pane of glass she stood up and made sure to just as slowly turn around, certain that if she moved too fast something bad might happen. Holding her breath at the thought of who was behind her because she already knew who it was. Even though they had just met and barely made acquaintance no one had ever made her feel as warm and as unsafe as this individual did.

She was just shocked that he had approached her again after she had very clearly snuck off with Finn.

But there he was again, Kylo the giant.

Just standing way too close behind her.

She took a step back instinctively to giver her some room to breathe but she could tell by the way he tensed up that he was planning on closing that space again.

"Oh"

Rey turned her head a little too fast and felt her neck strain uncomfortably.

 _That's going to suck to deal with tonight_

"I see you met my nephew, Kylo."

Rey just looked back and forth between the calm and steady in the middle of a storm Luke and the living version of a not so dormant volcano Kylo.

Luke looked a little ashen as he eyed Kylo across from her, nothing like his previous mirth remained in this moment and it made Rey wish to have it back. She glanced up to Kylo to see what he made of the scenario but he was glaring something fierce at the older man, and if his eyes could shoot lasers there would be a pile of dust where Luke stood.

"Nephew?"

Luke spoke to Kylo like he hadn't heard her question.

"Kylo, there is some stock that needs to be sorted in the back still. Why don't you do that and then you can head home. I will close tonight."

It was said with such authority that even Rey had no chance of taking the statements as anything other than an order.

Sparks flew between the two making Rey feel very uncomfortable. She had never really been good around family dynamics good or bad.

She started shifting from foot to foot drawing Kylo's attention away from his 'uncle' and reached forward like a snake strike. She had clasped her hands in front of her as she was wont to do when uncomfortable. He grabbed her right hand and shoved his larger hand into it.

It almost looked like he was shaking her hand but she knew it was more than that by the piece of paper she could feel slip between their hands.

She barely had time to register the contact of his scalding hand in hers before he fisted his hand around hers to seemingly hide the scrap from Luke who was clearly holding his breath tightly.

"Nice to have met you Rey. Hopefully we will meet again."

For as tightly wound as he was Luke only seemed to come back into himself as Kylo let her go.

"Yeah."

That was all she managed to squeak out before with a swish he turned around on the ball of his foot dramatically and stomped to the back of the store slamming a door that said "Employees Only".

As she rubbed the piece of paper between her fingers she could feel Luke's gaze flickering back and forth between her and Kylo furtively.

She could only think,

 _Get that man a cape_

AN: I am open to all suggestions. I have a tentative area I am planning on this going and I plan on it being very thriller and dark but if you all have something you would like to see I am open to opinions. It doesn't mean I will take everything you say but you never know. Please review and subscribe if you like it, I do plan on getting through a few more chapters especially depending on reader reactions. Thanks for reading love you all!


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

AN: I love all of the reviews and support I have gotten. Reviews give me life and the push to write so please do not hesitate to review and I'll even respond if I can. I will be dabbling back into the past eventually and hopefully that will explain people's different personalities but they are still at their cores going to be the characters we love.

Kylo rested his chin in his hand and observed the screens in front of him.

Watching the images flicker across his intent profile one might think him entranced or bewitched by the light emanating, but others might see beyond that to the almost sinister lift to his full lips as the shadows danced in his dark eyes.

A dance of light and dark.

 _My life in a nutshell_

Closing his eyes didn't make the images he had been watching disappear. If anything, it made them just a bit more vibrant. Because without the external stimulation of the video his imagination had full range to fill in all of those gaps, and what an imagination.

He hadn't gotten a good enough look at her eyes.

It infuriates him.

Every time he had tried to get closer just to see what color her eyes were, something or someone had gotten in his way.

He could see her hair color thanks to his height but her eyes eluded him.

The screens weren't much help either.

The cameras in Uncle Luke's shop weren't the highest quality as it was and he was trying to piece together frames on his higher end desktop which only served to emphasis the flaws and pixel degradation more clearly.

Not for the first time Kylo cursed his Uncles inability to understand that the '70's were long dead and update with modern times.

The cameras had painted a sickly green shade onto her hazelnut colored hair.

Needless to say, it was painstaking and annoying.

Then again, he found most things painstaking and annoying.

Like Luke, and his inherent need to butt into his life constantly. What did it matter to the old man if he was trying to talk with the girl. Just because he was stuck with Luke in his smelly shop for the foreseeable future did not give Luke control over him.

Just the thought of Luke or anyone having control over him made him start to see red on the edges of his vision.

His vision cleared at the passing of the tapes showed more of the passing day in the shop, moments he wasn't there for because of that annoying woman and _friend_ , he thought with a sneer.

Shaking his head, he knew he needed to get this finished. If the tapes weren't back in Luke's office by daybreak he would catch hell again from Luke.

With Luke already on him about his interest in the girl he didn't want to draw anymore undue notice from the wily old man.

His eyes caught on the frames passing by on the screen and froze tape.

The cameras were stupid but they managed to capture a perfect still image of the moment he grabbed her hands and slipped her his note.

His eyes started to strain the longer he stared at the bright screen without closing. Moisture tried to fill his eyes to compensate for not blinking, but almost as a 'fuck you' to his body trying to betray him into breaking this moment he let the moisture leak down his face freely.

He could see his back, but he didn't need to see himself, and he saw her face as he had grabbed her hands.

Just over his broad shoulder.

She was so surprised and pretty.

Their hands were joined just to the side of their bodies.

A sigh rumbled its way out of his wide chest almost like the purr of a large cat, and he finally blinked cursing himself.

He made sure to save this image among the many others he had pulled from the tapes but this special one he made his background picture.

He could look at this moment and it would fuel him to do what needed to be done.

Like food for his soul.

His eyes narrowed at the picture with hate at a sudden realization.

 _He_ _ **still**_ _couldn't see her fucking eyes!_

It had been a week since Finn and Rey had brought BB back to Finn and Poe's new place. Poe had taken one look at the kitten and had barely been able to part with her for the rest of the day.

This left Rey and Finn to take over the unpacking party Poe had been busy with.

It took three days to finish unpacking and Rey was glad that she had taken the whole week off to help because she was going to need the next three days to recover.

"Jeez, I never knew you guys had so much shit."

They were all sitting on the sofa recuperating with BB running around in the background playing with the feather ball they had gotten with her at the pet store.

Pizza and Chinese food remnants cooling on the coffee table.

"I know right? When did we manage to get this much stuff Finn?"

"Between the two of us and your mom are you really that surprised?"

Finn just raised his eyebrow at Poe amusedly.

Rey just watched their interaction with a small smile. She loved how in love they were. It gave her hope that if Finn was able to find such a great match for him and his eccentric ways that there would eventually be someone out there for her.

If only they could look past her clashing need to both be left alone and worshipped simultaneously.

 _Yeah, right_

Her thought caused the smile to fade a little and the warmth in her chest at the couple's banter chilled.

BB must have gotten bored with her ball because she bounded onto the couch in between the couple and circled in on herself to nap.

 _The look like a picture-perfect family_

 _Where do I fit in?_

Rey's wayward thoughts forced her to realize that no matter how much Finn and Poe included her in their activities it could only go so far.

They were growing up without her and it was only a matter of time before they left her behind.

Mired in her sadness as she was she didn't feel Finn slipping his arm around her shoulders but she startled at the pull she felt and her head fell onto her best friend's shoulder like a puzzle piece.

Trust Finn to always know when she got into one of her funks.

She thanked her stars not for the first time in the years since Finn and Poe got together that Poe understood and respected hers and Finn's relationship. A less confident partner would feel threatened at their closeness but anyone who knew them would tell you that they were closer than siblings.

More akin to soulmates the two couldn't be separated.

Finn knew of the pain Rey still struggled with because of her childhood, abandonment issues and Rey knew of Finn's struggle with his religious choices, his sexuality and his parents' reaction to it.

They found comfort and understanding in each other when the world afforded them none.

"So, when do you finally leave and stop camping on our sofa?"

"Shut up Poe"

They laughed as Rey and Finn simultaneously said the familiar line once again for what felt like the millionth time. Amongst the dying giggles Finn threw a cushion at the mans question.

They both knew that Poe was just breaking the tension, as he always did when Rey and Finn got into one of their moods.

Poe always knew just what to say to help them move forward instead of being mired in the past.

"By the way, I received a call yesterday. It was from the pet store you guys got BB from."

"Oh? What did they call about? Was there something wrong with BB's paperwork?"

Rey could hear the curiosity and mild alarm in Finn's voice as he stood up to fix the couch. Whenever he got nervous about something Finn cleaned.

Poe rushed to reassure his nervous lover.

"No, no, nothing like that. I think they were just looking to reaffirm that everything was working out with BB and that we didn't have any questions or concerns on her care. I think?"

Poe just shook his head and scratched his scalp.

Rey latched onto that last part as a now relieved Finn grabbed BB up and danced into the kitchen with her above his head, the pestered kitten just "mew"-ed at him so high pitched it almost sounded more like beep than a meow.

"What do you mean you think?"

"I don't know exactly. The questions seemed normal enough at first, but then just as I seemed to not be paying attention it was like,"

Rey could see Poe was struggling to explain.

"It was like, they would ask something odd, but then they had reasonable explanations for asking. Like they asked how many people lived here, or who we had around BB, I wasn't paying attention and told them we had a female who lived above us that was around pretty often. Then I asked how that was important when I realized what I had said. They explained that it was a policy of the adoption process that they check to see that the people around the pet isn't negative. It seemed like an ok explanation at the time but the more I think about it the weirder it gets, and if that was the only example I wouldn't have thought twice about it but he kept doing it."

"He? Who was this that called?"

"He said it was Ben and he gave the name of the place, Ahch-To Pet Adoption, but when he said his name, there was something off about it, like he had to force himself to say it."

Seeing Poe look this out of sorts over a phone call was a bit jarring as there was very little that could cause any upset in the seemingly boundless optimism of Poe Dameron, but this was a thing apparently.

"After I told him that we had another person around pretty often he asked for a name, number, work number and address. I told him I wasn't all that comfortable giving out that information to a stranger, especially since I know how you feel about people having information on you,"

Rey just nodded in understanding, knowing that Poe wouldn't have given anything about her away if it wasn't important.

"But he told me that if I didn't that they could take BB away for not keeping her safe or some shit. He said they had to do a background check on anyone around her and that they did it for all pets adopted out from this place. I called bullshit, but apparently it's legit, but it says on the site that its very rarely enforced and with Luke having known Finn we didn't think anything like that would need to happen, but…"

Poe just shrugged.

"Sorry, but I gave him your info so you might be getting a call or something soon letting you know they're doing a check."

Rey just shook her head. While intrusive she knew it couldn't be helped and even so she had nothing to hide. There wasn't anything they could use to take away BB.

"Poe, you don't need to apologize. I know."

They both just listened to Finn in the next room cooing to the kitten like a baby and Rey knew Poe would do almost anything to keep Finn that happy, and Rey didn't blame him, she would do the same.

"There was something about his voice though. It was like it drew you in, and made you want to answer. I felt like he was in my head."

He shivered at the memory.

"Was it that bad?"

"That's the thing, his voice wasn't bad. Just scary good. That's a man who would give good phone sex, it was when I mentioned you that he got scary intense."

He hadn't popped into Rey's thoughts much the last few days but she could only think of one person this sounded like, but Poe said the caller identified as 'Ben', so it couldn't be him.

"He didn't ask anything super personal, it was like a switch though, as soon as I said your name he almost, inhaled like he was out of breath or something. It was like I was Jodie Foster in Silence of the Lambs talking to Hannibal Lecter. I hated listening to him talk and didn't want to give him anything but the more I tried to stop the more the voice drew me in."

Rey couldn't believe how shook Poe was over this.

"I just hope he doesn't call back and I'm sorry you might have to talk to him. I just wanted to give you a heads up."

"Thanks. I'll definitely be aware."

'Ben' or rather Kylo as he preferred to never consider his birth name ever again in conjecture with himself, knew that for the most part he had covered his tracks from Luke pretty well.

He just had to make sure that the paperwork was in the file before start of work the next day and that Mark, the intern, kept his mouth shut.

Thanks to Mark's need to party his weekend away he was more than happy to throw his assignment of checking up on the adopters given to him by Kylos Uncle to him when he 'magnanimously' offered.

They both agreed to keep quiet about it and Kylo didn't even need to intimidate the man like he had been planning.

If it had been needed of course.

Mark got to be irresponsible and right now that worked for Kylo just fine, and Luke didn't need to know a thing.

Serendipity just came to him and all but offered Rey's information to him on a plate.

Admittedly he had asked for more information than the forms asked him to get, but no one needed to know that that information was for himself.

Kylo had been surprised that Rey lived above her friends, he pictured her as being more of a loner than that, but maybe there were circumstances he was unaware of.

It would make navigating more difficult for sure but he was nothing if not resourceful.

Making sure to copy the information gained from Poe into his notebook meticulously he marveled how easy it had been to just lower his voice and gruff it up a bit and the guy had just spilled everything Kylo had needed to know.

A part of him believed that this was destiny or fate easing his way to Rey.

That for once in his miserable life destiny hadn't thought to kick him in the nuts, instead it had handed him a flower.

He didn't know what to do with himself.

So, he looked at the pictures he had framed around his apartment.

The apartment itself was grey with accents of red.

Comfort in general was very important to him. Lots of plush surfaces with pillows and soft blankets on the couch.

Same for the bedroom.

A huge bed, to fit his massive frame, and hopefully someday soon a bit of room for a smaller frame. She wouldn't need too much room though as she would mostly be sleeping on top of him.

He smiled to himself as he remembered Rey asking him if his favorite color was black, and while it wasn't his favorite it was up there.

Red remained number one though.

Rubbing his palms along his thighs he felt the scratchy material of his jeans rake against his palms.

It had been two days and twelve hours since he had last seen Rey, in person anyway, glancing at the pictures again.

Even the good fortune of obtaining the information he had needed so easily wasn't enough to sate him.

He needed to see her or communicate with her.

Much to his mounting chagrin though, she hadn't acknowledged him since he had shoved his note at her.

He knew she still had it when she left the store.

He had watched on the security screens in the backroom as she conversed with Luke for a minute after his departure, and she hadn't given his note to Luke or thrown it away on her way out.

She might have thrown it away after or in the time since but he doubted it.

Flopping down onto his bed, his massive frame sinking into the bed deliciously, he imagined.

Running his large hands over his face, trailing them down his neck, short fingernails scratching lightly on his skin.

Stopping on his chest, lacing his fingers together over his heart where Rey dwelled.

It was all he could do.

Imagine.

For now.

It had been his only way of escaping his fucked life growing up and it continued to be his only form of escapism.

He imagined Rey with him all the time now, and the loneliness abated somewhat.

He knew it would be better in the flesh, but he would take what he could get for now.

He was patient.

He was.

He would have to be.

His eyes narrowed at the ceiling glinting glowing gold in the dark.

For now.

AN: OK! I received so much praise and awesome constructive criticism for my first chapter and I really hope that continues for this chapter because I adored it. More than you all know I live for the kudos, reviews, and subscriptions I see whenever I check my email notifications. You all are so great and I hope you continue to enjoy this work. I already have the third chapter finished because I broke this up into two lol that's how long this was because every time I would take a break from this and check my email I would have another awesome review and it would push me to keep writing till before I knew it my 2nd chapter was over 14 pages lol. Love you guys so much and I will continue to try my best to respond to reviews. For those of you who wanted Creepy!Kylo I hope I made you proud and happy, but if not let me know because it gets better in the next chapter. *wink wink*


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

AN: You all are the best! Please keep up the reviews if you like this story! It makes me giggle every time I get one. I am trying my best to stay 2 chapters ahead on this so I can have a steady posting time of every Tuesday. Barring something happening I should be on course for the foreseeable future. I am almost finished with chapter 5 as of posting this so yay! I am almost continuously going back to chapters I haven't posted yet and tweaking things here and there.

There was a part of Kylo that he was sure was out to sabotage himself.

Why else would he push into doing something this stupid?

He had had people all his life telling him what his weaknesses are, but none of them had told him idiocy was one of them.

Temper, selfishness, obsessiveness, control, some brave (read stupid) souls would even venture to mention that he had severe mommy issues.

All of these and some more were his list of weaknesses he knew, but most of his life his intelligence had been the one thing that had been a point of pride for him.

This incident had to prove that wrong, because this was the move of a dumb person.

He had just been sitting in his car across the street watching Rey's window like a normal person, fuming on why she hadn't contacted him yet, when he had noticed it.

An open window in the darkness.

Later that evening, bordering between dusk and night, Rey, after her conversation with Poe, had finally gotten back up to her own apartment. She knew that over the last three days she could have gone back up to her place easily, but knowing Finn and Poe were right below her just made her gravitate back there.

Looking around the comfortable but quiet darkness of the apartment she thought,

 _Why would I want to be here alone when I have the people I love within walking distance?_

Being alone was a natural state of being for Rey normally because she had never really had anything to leave for, outside of work of course.

Finn and Poe had lived far enough away that getting around without a car was a hassle and she hated the bus.

So, she stayed home.

Now though they were downstairs and she wanted to be with them, but she also knew that social graces and boundaries weren't her strongest forte. She needed to give them time to themselves as much as she felt selfish for not wanting to.

Sitting down in her plush recliner surrounded by her things made her feel a bit better in general.

Everything was exactly as she liked it and in its place.

She could walk around this place blind folded and be ok.

It was in moments like these where she wondered if getting a pet was for her or not. Could she really handle the responsibility that came with a cat or dog?

Maybe a fish, she had had one when she was in a foster home once.

Won at a carnival.

There was a boy at the home as well who had become jealous that she won something when he didn't, so when she was asleep he flushed the fish down the toilet.

The family she was living with didn't believe her and insisted she did it and they made her clean for them for the rest of her thankfully brief time there to compensate them for the things they bought for the fish when she won it.

The only things they had bought were a bottle of food no bigger than her thumb and a glass bowl.

With a sigh she sat up, the squeak of the recliners gears a comforting sound in the solitude.

Stretching and bending she started shedding her clothes haphazardly on her way to the bathroom.

She usually wasn't a huge fan of mess, a remnant of her time living with families that beat cleanliness into you, but it was in these little, easily cleanable messes that she used to fight back those memories.

Her one real luxury she allowed herself was her tub. A huge clawfoot monstrosity she had restored from a garbage pile down the street.

It had taken her almost 12 hours to get it back to her place on her own and then the stairs.

But she had done it and it was hers.

Thankfully her bathroom was larger than her kitchen otherwise it would have never fit.

It was more like a jacuzzi than a tub and used up so much water but Rey didn't care.

She had always loved swimming and water.

Closing the bathroom door so that the steam could permeate the air, she sat on the side of the tub, the coldness of the porcelain seeping into her body through the contact. It reminded her of the cold pressure of Kylo's hands in hers just days before.

Turning the water on hot for her sore muscles was a must, she turned toward the mirror and began to brush her hair slowly, savoring the pull of the brush with each repeated motion.

Closing her eyes and between the running of the tub in the background and the brushing motions she felt almost meditative.

Feeling the rest of the world fall around her she allowed her consciousness to drift in a blank darkness that was her canvas.

It allowed her to truly imagine someone was with her, behind her, brushing her hair for her, watching her nude body sway with each push and pull of the brush.

They would then lead her away from the sink and lift her against their hard, pale body and slowly lower her into the still filling tub.

Sitting beside the tub they would soap her blue loofa and languidly lift her leg out of the tub and softly run it up her leg, tickling the inside of her thigh as he submerged his arm into the water to reach…

*SMASH*

Jolting out of her reverie Rey rushed and grabbed her towel off the back of the door and slowly opened the door back into the living room.

There appeared to be nothing out of the ordinary, so why did she hear a smash?

Taking a step into the darkening living room she felt something crunch under her foot.

Looking down she saw a picture frame face down under her foot.

Lifting it she saw it was a picture of herself, alone, one someone had taken while she wasn't paying attention. It looked very artsy and made Rey feel special. That someone had wanted a picture of her so badly.

She had asked for a copy to remember that feeling.

Never mind that the person who took it was a photography student who had just been taking nature pictures, but Rey chose to not think about that.

She had a distinct lack of pictures of herself and liked to keep what she could get.

But how did this fall off of the bookshelf?

Was someone in her apartment?

Walking over to her door she saw that the locks were as she left them which was locked with three different locks all requiring a key from the outside.

Growing up with a lack of privacy made one appreciate the ability to make sure no one could be in her space unless she let them.

So, what happened?

Looking around furtively, as if something or someone might jump out at her but there was nothing.

She however did notice the open window.

With a relived sigh she walked over to it, even though she really didn't remember opening it she reasoned that she must have left it open earlier and a wind gust had knocked the picture over.

Shaking her head, she closed the window softly and she put the picture back on the shelf but as she did she noticed it.

That seemingly innocuous piece of paper Kylo had handed her.

She had placed it on her shelf with half a mind to toss it out but something stayed her hand every time she went to put it in the bin.

It was the look in his eyes as he had handed it to her.

There was a desperation in them which resonated with her deeply.

Like if she didn't take what he was handing her he would break and never be able to put himself back together again.

That's how she had felt when she had first let Finn in without any guarantees that he would accept her.

She had been terrified then and that's what she had seen in Kylo's eyes.

She hadn't been able to toss it away.

She also hadn't been able to actually use the number on the paper either.

She had to assume it was a phone number.

She played tough and strong but she was scared at heart, always scared.

The things she had felt in his touch had scared her more than anything had in a long time.

Picking the paper up like it might bite her she brought with her to the bathroom.

Turning the tub off since it was pretty full at this point, she threw her towel onto the top of the closed toilet.

Sinking into the tub with the paper in her hands, making sure it didn't get wet she tentatively brought it to her nose.

It smelled of him.

She didn't know how she knew, but she knew it in the back of her mind.

This was his scent.

It had managed to survive on this piece of paper after three whole days.

She could only imagine how it would smell coming straight from the source.

Her eyes rolled back into her head as she inhaled as hard as she could, making sure her exhale was aimed away from the paper.

What did he want from her?

Why go through all the trouble of giving this to her?

Was he waiting? Sitting by his phone like a puppy, just staring at the phone like his pure will could make it ring or beep with something from her? Keeping it by his side constantly so that he wouldn't miss it if she did.

She felt a tingle start at the base of her spine at the thoughts.

She knew it was impossible that these were real scenarios.

Not with what he looked and sounded like, not with those beautifully awkward and rare smiles, but she liked imagining.

Imagining his crooked teeth biting his lip as he waited patiently and sometimes not so patiently for the phone to go off.

She could see him raging like a mad bull, dark amber eyes flashing like lightning at the phone and cursing her name for not messaging, and after with him on his knees sweetly begging the same phone to do something, anything to free him from the torment of waiting.

She came back to herself with her hand half out of the tub reaching for the phone when it went off.

A bright little light in the grey shadows of the bathroom.

Finishing her descent to pick up the phone she felt another shiver for a different reason go down her body from the cold air of the bathroom after being in the hot tub.

Checking the phone, she saw that it was just an email notification from work.

She felt a pang of something, disappointment?

How could she feel disappointed that he didn't message when he doesn't even have her number?

If she wanted to hear from him she was going to have to make the first move.

Technically the second move, as he had handed her the number for the first one.

Obviously, he wanted to hear from her to some extent or he wouldn't have given her the number.

Right?

Damn her anxiety and self-esteem issues.

Maybe he was one of those guys who handed their number out willy-nilly hoping to get somewhere with whoever messaged back?

With another deep inhale of the paper to steady her nerves she opened the number pad on her phone with trembling fingers and typed the number in slowly.

Clicking the phone over to messenger as in general she wasn't a fan of talking to people on the phone. That's why she received emails from work because she told them she refused to answer phone calls.

A simple "Hi" was typed into the box her thumb hovering.

Another deep breath and her thumb pressed.

SEND

AN: Also, you all might notice that my writing style may change depending on who I am writing about or in the thoughts of, this is both intentional and my style of writing as I try to channel the personality of the character I am writing to better give a voice to them. Reviews give me life!


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